The Impact of Early Habits on Children's Growth and Happiness

by Emilia Osorio

"We first make our habits, then our habits make us." – John Dryden

Common Aspirations of Parents

Every parent shares a common aspiration: to see their children grow into happy, independent, and responsible adults. This goal often begins even before our kids are born, as we envision bright futures filled with success, personal development, and fulfillment. However, while we set these high expectations for our children's growth, we sometimes overlook the small, daily habits and actions that guide them toward these aspirations.

Bridging Dreams and Reality

It’s one thing to dream big for our children, but bridging the gap between those dreams and reality requires consistent, intentional action. Success isn’t a one-time event; it’s the result of countless small steps taken over time. Every day presents an opportunity to reinforce the habits that will shape our children's future. For instance, something as simple as teaching a child to clean up after themselves—whether it’s putting away toys after playtime, tidying up the table after a meal, or taking responsibility for keeping their room neat—builds a foundation of personal responsibility and orderliness. These small, everyday habits teach kids to take ownership of their environment, setting the stage for greater independence as they grow.

The Role of Parents in Habit Formation

While these habits might seem straightforward, getting children to adopt them is a process that requires time, patience, and consistency from parents. It’s in the countless small moments—when we’re tired after a long day but still encourage them to pick up their toys or help clean up after dinner—that we show them the value of perseverance. The key is in modeling consistency, day after day, and demonstrating that sticking with a habit, even when it’s hard, is what leads to lasting change. Through this, we teach our children that true growth comes from persistence.

Teaching Resilience Through Independence

Teaching a toddler to put on their shoes or zip up their jacket, or allowing a preschooler to pour their own drink without rushing to help at the first sign of struggle, are powerful ways to teach persistence and build resilience. As children grow, these small, independent tasks evolve into opportunities to develop accountability and instill lifelong habits. In fact, according to the long-running Harvard Study of Adult Development, there is a strong correlation between children participating in household chores and later success and well-being in adulthood. The study shows that children who regularly do chores tend to be more successful and happier later in life. By letting them experience frustration and figure things out on their own, we give them the tools to create healthy habits and navigate challenges with confidence.

The Importance of Developmentally Appropriate Habits

Habits are especially impactful in childhood. They provide confidence, structure, and a sense of control, helping kids navigate life’s challenges with resilience. But understanding where a child is developmentally is key. Habits must be tailored to their age and ability level, ensuring they align with a child's cognitive and behavioral growth.

A child’s understanding of cause and effect, or their ability to remember and apply lessons learned, evolves with age. By recognizing what they’re ready for at different stages, we can create habits that grow with them. This alignment ensures that the habits they form today will serve them well into the future, supporting their growth and happiness in meaningful ways.